I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
two words: eviction party
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
