Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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