i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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