Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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