Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
don't judge my taste in strippers
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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