Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
