He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize
