Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
