after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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