he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
