At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Randomize
