I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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