I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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