i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
we made out on top of his cat.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
