On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
