If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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