I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
