There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize