she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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