she was so not down for the gang bang
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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