Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
So squirting runs in the family.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize