So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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