You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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