I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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