Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
