'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize