I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
