he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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