It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
