idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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