btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize