why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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