Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
