Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
