So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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