his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
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