Kiss
Puke
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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