just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Randomize
