I don't usually arrange sex via text message
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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