Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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