I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
