What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
