Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
