I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
