hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
