I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize