I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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