Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize