haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
