What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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