i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize